Frozen: Diary of Anna
by AspiringAuthor96
Summary: This is the story of Frozen in the form of Anna's secret diary. She writes as the years go by to help her cope the lost sisterhood bond with Elsa. What will she discover as time goes by? And who will she be at the end of her own journey? *Written in Anna's POV.*
1. Chapter 1

**Frozen: Diary of Anna**

**DISCLAIMERS: I do NOT own the movie Frozen or any of its' characters. You have been warned. **

**Chapter One: Where Did I Go Wrong?**

** Page One of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

Well, after dreaming that I was kissed by a troll again, I woke up from a long and sleepy nap to find that my beloved big sister, Elsa, isn't even there.

Her stuff and her bed are gone too!

What happened?

Did she move out of the room, because she didn't want to play anymore?

I ran out of my empty room to find Elsa, looking at me sadly, before closing the door on me.

I'm surprised and very sad now. Does this mean we won't play anymore?

I never meant to make her mad at me.

Does she… hate me?

Where did I go wrong?


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: I Miss Her**

** Page Five of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

I have no one to play with! Even though the sky is awake, and I'm awake, Elsa is not there to play with me.

I'm so bored!

I start to run around the castle like a wild spirit and I then crashed into a suit of armor that was so noisy that everyone was opening the doors to see what is going on.

Oops.

In a flash, I fled to my room, hid under the covers and pretended to fall asleep.

"ANNALISE KRISTINE SIGRID!"

Uh-oh.

Papa only used my middle name for when I'm _really _in trouble. His mad voice made my heart jump in fear.

I'm so scared right now.

Yet somehow, out of my tiny stores of bravery, I slowly get up and this time, walk to go see Papa in the great hall.

"Explain yourself!" while he pointed to what's left of the suit of armor.

He was _really_ mad at me. Normally, when Elsa was by my side, like she always was before shutting me out, she would take the blame, as she didn't like seeing me be upset and cry.

Now that she is not there anymore, I have to fend for myself.

"It was an accident." It was true; I didn't mean to hit the suit of armor.

"Please don't be mad, Papa. I was only trying to have fun."

I hate crying more than anything, diary. Yet, every time I do or say something that goes wrong, I just start the waterworks.

Papa knew this too. "Anna, I did not mean to make you upset. However, I do want you to take responsibility for your actions. Your mother and I will not be here forever."

What?

They're leaving Elsa and me? But why?

"You're leaving us? When? Who's going to take care of us?"

He laughed before picking me up and setting me on his lap: "Listen to me, Anna. Parents aren't given to for us for a lifetime. They are only loaned to us by the Heavens for a certain amount of time. Now, I promise you that nothing will happen to your mother or I for a long while. You just need to learn to take accountability for everything you say and do, as you and Elsa are the future of Arendelle."

Elsa… what has happened to her? She just disappeared on me. But I will always love her no matter what.

"Papa?"

"Yes, Anna?"

"I miss her."

"I know you do, darling. But right now… she just needs to be alone for a while, at least… until she is ready."

"Ready for what?"

"To become the future Queen of Arendelle."

"And I'll be her right hand and be there for her?"

"Always."

And so diary, I made a promise that day. To always be there for Elsa and love her, even if it takes forever to open that door.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Two: Do You Want to Build a Snowman? (Part One)**

**Page Ten** **of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

I woke up and it's snowing! Time to go see Elsa!

I haven't seen her in forever!

I ran out of my room and giggled while trying to knock.

"Elsa?"

I knocked five times!

And so, I sang with all my heart:

"_Do you want to build a snowman?_

_Come on, let's go and play!_

I swung my arms wide as I could to point out that I really wanted to play with her.

Nothing.

_I never see you anymore_

_Come out the door_

I bent over to look under the door for her. Still don't see her.

_It's like you've gone away!_

I grabbed my dolls that mama made for us and played with them in the great hall.

_We used to be best buddies_

_And now we're not_

_I wish you would tell me why!_

I sighed and feel crushed.

But I soon went back to her door with hope.

_Do you want to build a snowman?_

I stuck my mouth in the keyhole to let her know that she can't get rid of me!

_It doesn't have to be a snowman…"_

Elsa said: "Go away, Anna."

…

I'm very hurt now…

"_Okay, bye."_

The tears are falling down.

And so I left without another word.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: With Everyone, Yet All Alone**

** Page Fifteen of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

Today I am six years old! I am so excited that I am jumping up on my bed again and again and again!

Elsa will be there today! I just know it!

And all of that yummy food! Pot roast and ice cream and chocolate!

My energy at a crazy high, I ran out of my room to knock furiously on Elsa's door.

"Elsa! It's my birthday today!"

Nothing. Not even a stir from her.

"Come on, Els! Wake up! There will be chocolate there!"

I knew that it had to work! Nothing else says to Elsa "I'm here" faster than chocolate from the finest shops in Arendelle!

Zero.

"Please, Elsa? I need your help with me eating the cake."

Not a single word. It's like she… doesn't even want me there.

"Well, I'll… see you whenever." I will not cry at my own birthday today. _I will not. _

Honestly, diary? The whole day kind of went downhill after that.

Over the course of the day, the people of Arendelle were invited and were having a great time. There was lots of food and decorations everywhere around the castle.

Yet, I was all alone.

Kai, one of our royal servants, noticed me looking kind of down and unhappy.

"What's wrong, little one? You should be out celebrating the most important day of the year!"

Actually, Elsa's birthday is the most important day of the year, but I don't bother correcting him.

"Elsa is not here. I want her to be here. Can you tell me why she doesn't love me?"

Kai looked at me in my eyes and said: "Oh, Anna. She loves you dearly. She… just needs time to herself, that's all."

Hey! That's what Papa said too! Are they… hiding something?

Doesn't matter.

"Well, can you tell her I said hi and that I love her very much?"

"Of course, little one. Now get out there and be yourself!"

Around mid-afternoon, I got some presents and that did cheer me up. Mama gave me her violin that her mama passed on to her and every girl before that. It was least a hundred years old! I was so happy that I tried to play it at once, but was soon greeted with sharp squeaks.

Ouch.

Maybe I'll save it for another time.

I also got new clothes, my first bow and arrows that were made from the royal blacksmith and some amazing chocolate too! If only Elsa were here so that I can share it with her.

"Thank you so much, everyone! I really love my presents!" I felt really happy right now and didn't have a care of the world for a moment.

Later, when all of the guests have left the party, Mama and Papa went up to me and asked me to come with them.

"What is it?"

"It's a surprise, dear Anna." Mama said with gentleness in her voice.

They led me to the stables and there he was- a beautiful tan stallion, outfitted with riding gear!

WOW!

"Thank you, Mama and Papa!" and went to hug them.

"Don't thank us, Anna. Thank your sister." Papa said as he looked up to Elsa's window.

Elsa did this? For me? I can't believe it! She does love me!

Now, I feel guilty for believing that she doesn't love me.

But no matter though!

I went up to Elsa's room as fast as I could and knocked like a _slightly_ mad woman.

"Elsa! I just wanted to say thank you so much for your present! I love him already! But I love you more! He's beautiful! But you're beautifuller! I can't wait to ride… Hmm… What should his name be, Els?"

Then I got a brilliant idea and pretended it was Elsa's idea all along.

"Oh! I know! Magnus! His name is Magnus! Thank you Elsa for the wonderful name! Have a good night! I love you!"

And then I crawled into my bed happy for the first time in a year.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Three: Do You Want to Build a Snowman? (Part Two)**

** Page Twenty of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

It's been four years since I've last seen Elsa. Despite my repeated attempts to get her to come out of her room (to no avail, I might add), she just… ignores me.

What the heck did I do or am doing to her, diary?

Was I really _that_ annoying to her when I was little? She could at least cut me some slack.

I am very tired from today's lessons. Of course, since I'm the Princess, I just _have _to learn everything about being a _proper _Princess. This includes studying Arendelle's history and culture as well as the Seven Liberal Arts, which _that _includes grammar, rhetoric, logic, arithmetic, geometry, astronomy, and music!

Heck! I even have to know how to curtsey in front of strangers! I'm only nine years of age!

I mean… whatever, right?

Truth is, horseback riding is the only thing that keeps me distracted from thinking about her.

That and I can't sit still during lessons. Must be all that chocolate that I secretly eat at night.

You know something, diary? I leave a piece of chocolate in front of Elsa's door, knock and hide behind the bookcase, just waiting for her to come out. By the time midnight hits, I'm somehow in bed asleep. When I wake up the next morning, the chocolate disappears.

Maybe there is hope?

Ah, who am I kidding?

But today, I am not deterred!

While skipping over to Elsa's room, I laughed out loud for no reason, hoping she would hear me.

And then, the famous five-time knock!

"_Do you want to build a snowman?_

_Or ride our bike around the halls?_

I rode my bicycle around the hallway and down the stairs! And as usual, crashed into a suit of armor.

Clumsy me!

_I think some company is overdue_

_I've started talking to the pictures on the walls!_

(Hang in there, Joan!)

I always aspired to be like her, fearless and just like Elsa!

_It gets a little lonely,_

_All these empty rooms_

_Just watching the hours tick by…"_

I've lain back lazily, just staring endlessly at the grandfather clock.

Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock…

Ah, this is boring!

Later on that afternoon, I went to see Magnus and he's still cute as ever.

"Hey big boy! Did you miss me?" I said as I went to pet him.

He just snorted into my face.

Rude much?

"Uh, excuse me sir. No apples for you then."

He whinnied in response.

"Well, you were the rude one in the first place!"

Did he seriously just give me an eye roll?

My goodness, who the heck has corrupted my beloved horse? And that's when I noticed that people are staring at me like I lost my head or something.

Oh yeah. I do talk to Magnus like it's nothing.

But of course, I would talk to him! Sometimes, I need expert advice!

Plus, he's a really good listener too! Except when sometimes, I go on and on about my day and he causally lies down until I hear a very obnoxious snoring sound.

I guess he really is the polar opposite of me. I hate rudeness more than anything.

Anyway, I started talking to Magnus about my sisterly bond with Elsa, and how it's starting to… I… don't know what word to use to describe this emotional pain.

Crumbling? No, that's too weak.

More like deteriorating.

Despite my best attempts to hold the friendship together behind closed doors, it really is starting to fall apart.

Where is she where I need her the most?

Every person I talked to in the castle, everyone in Arendelle, they all tell me the same damn thing:

"She just needs time to herself."

She can't spare any time for me?

No. Stop thinking like that, Anna.

I will not give up on her. I made that promise a long time ago. I will see her again even it takes to the end of time.


	6. Chapter 6

**The following song 'composed' by Anna is the song "I Won't Let Go" by Rascal Flatts, played on violin. **

**Thanks to everyone for the reviews so far!**

**Much gratitude,**

**AspiringAuthor96 **

**Chapter Six: Elsa's Birthday**

** Page Twenty-Five of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

Today is Elsa's birthday! She is sixteen years old!

I planned a special surprise for her! Even if I'm on the other side of the door.

I've been taking violin lessons from my violin tutor Constance for about seven years now and for the past few months, I've been perfecting a song that I've composed myself!

I've also been doing a little bit of culinary arts and baking over the years to prepare for this day and this time, I actually woke up at _seven_ in the morning!

Why you ask? To make a chocolate cupcake for Elsa!

Thank God, I don't have to do lessons today! Because, I'll be working in the kitchen with Gerda to make this cupcake.

Hopefully, I won't screw it up. But no promises!

And so, I spent about four hours making the damn cupcake (which the first time the cupcake came out, was a complete disaster, so I had to make a second one), then spent another hour of getting all of the chocolate off by proper washing because for some odd reason, licking your arms in public is not ladylike, and _then_ I had to get my violin and start rehearsing for Elsa's birthday song!

So all in all, it took about _seven_ hours of work.

But it was totally worth it.

By around the early evening, I finished rehearsing and knocked on Elsa's door with my violin in one hand and the delicious, so-tempted-to-eat-but-it's-for-Elsa cupcake in the other and I set the cupcake down by the table next to her door.

"Elsa? It's me! Happy birthday, big sister! Oh, how I missed you greatly. Anyway, I composed a song for you. So here it goes."

I start to play the first piece and went slow:

"_It's like a storm_

_That cuts a path_

_It breaks your will_

_It feels like that_

_You think you're lost_

_But you're not lost on your own_

_You're not alone_

_I will stand by you_

_I will help you through_

_When you've done all you can do_

_If you can't cope_

_I will dry your eyes_

_I will fight your fight_

_I will hold you tight_

_And I won't let go_

_It hurts my heart _

_To see you cry_

_I know it's dark_

_This part of life_

_Oh it finds us all_

_And we're too small_

_To stop the rain_

_Oh, but when it rains_

_I will stand by you_

_I will help you through_

_When you've done all you can do_

_If you can't cope_

_I will dry your eyes_

_I will fight your fight_

_I will hold you tight_

_And I won't let you fall_

_Don't be afraid to fall_

_I'm right here to catch you_

_I won't let you down_

_It won't get you down_

_You're gonna make it_

_Yeah I know you can make it_

_Cause I will stand by you_

_I will help you through_

_When you've done all you can do_

_If you can't cope_

_And I will dry your eyes_

_I will fight your fight_

_I will hold you tight_

_And I won't let go_

_Oh, I'm gonna hold you_

_And I won't let go_

_Won't let you go_

_No I won't…"_

As I finished the last piece smoothly, I heard soft crying.

"Elsa, are you okay?"

Nothing.

"May I come in and hold you? To let you know that I still love you?"

Still not a voice that I desperately wanted to hear.

All for nothing, then.

As I began to walk away dejectedly, I heard something from the other side of the door in a very discreet whisper: "Anna."

My eyes were as wide as dinner plates. Everything grinded to a shocking halt.

I immediately went back to Elsa's room and knocked again. "Elsa?"

Suddenly the voice was getting louder: "Anna."

"I'm right here, Elsa. What do you need?"

I can't believe it! I'm finally talking to my sister again and she's actually responding!

And then, Mother walked up to me and said: "Anna. Why are you bothering Elsa? I was trying to get your attention."

Oh…

So, she really doesn't… want to be bothered after all.

I can feel the tears welling up, so I told Mother that I wasn't feeling well and was going to head to bed.

As soon as I closed my door, I just let the tears roll down my face and crawled into bed, feeling miserable as always.

I cried myself to sleep that night, just like every other night.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven: What Happens Now?**

**Page Thirty of Princess Anna's Secret Diary- DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

It's been what? Ten years now?

As I ran past her eternally-closed door, I was strongly tempted to knock, like _every_ other day that I've knocked on her door, for the last ten damn years.

Truth is, I just… can't... do it anymore.

It's official diary, I've… given up on my beloved Elsa.

And so, for the first time in those ten years, I walked past her door without a single knock.

So diary, let me tell you something exciting! Father and Mother are going on a diplomatic mission for two weeks! I wish I could go with them, but I have to stay here.

Boo hiss.

Where were they going again? I couldn't remember for the life of me.

I think it was somewhere called…Weselton? I'm not sure.

They just finished packing when I ran up to them and hugged them tightly. "See you in two weeks!"

"Of course you will, Anna. We'll miss you greatly." My loving mother said with great kindness in her voice.

"We're so proud of you. When we get back, we have a lot to talk about." Father's voice was filled with pride after all the hard work I've done over the years.

A lot to talk about… what? Uh, what's exactly going on here? Are they _finally _going to tell me about what's been going on with Elsa?

Eh, I can wait!

I'll see them again soon anyway!

Later, I watched the ship sail away into the beautiful, reducing sunset and I already couldn't wait to see them again.

Five days have passed and still no word from either of them. They were supposed to be there two days ago.

A messenger from that country that Father and Mother were visiting frantically came up to Kai and said that his message was critical and of paramount significance. I happened to overhear and went up to the messenger.

"What is it, sir?" Kai spoke with somehow increasing concern in his voice.

Why would he be concerned? Unless…

Oh no…

Did something… happen to them?

"Princess Anna." The messenger bowed before me. "I sincerely apologize profusely to relay this message to you. The ship that carried King Agdar and Queen Idun had… capsized during a powerful storm. No one… survived. I'm sorry."

**WHAT?!**

**THEY'RE DEAD?! GONE FOREVER?!**

I suddenly felt a surge of emotions inside me swelling up to one bellow:

"**NOOOO! NO! THAT'S NOT TRUE GODDAMNIT! NO! PLEASE TELL THAT'S A LIE! PLEASE! PLEASE!"** while wailing uncontrollably.

Sure, I was the Royal Princess of Arendelle, but that day, I was still a young child who wanted to see her parents again.

I ran away from the great hall and immediately went to Elsa's room and knocked furiously:

"**ELSA! OPEN UP THIS GODDAMN DOOR BEFORE I BREAK IT DOWN! OUR PARENTS ARE DEAD! DO YOU HEAR ME IN THERE? PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE! I NEED YOU! PLEASE!" **

I was banging on her door relentlessly with hard knocks, then started getting softer as I was drifting away to a dreamless sleep from today's harrowing news.

"Please Elsa… please." As I slid down her door and for the first time, I don't… feel anything.

No remorse. Or anger. Or even bereavement.

The hot tears are still streaking my face.

"Please…" I said with a very weak voice.

_Go to sleep, Anna and everything will be alright, _a voice spoke in my head.

No…

Nothing will be alright. I will never be the same again.

As I started to fall asleep, I had only one question that came to me:

Oh dear God, what happens now?


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight: Do You Want to Build a Snowman? (Part Three)**

** Page Thirty-Five of Princess Anna's Secret Diary-DO NOT READ!**

Dear diary,

I woke up somehow in my bed. The last thing I remember is knocking on Elsa's door telling her to open up because…

Oh, God.

It really did happen.

Father and Mother are dead.

I've stopped crying hours ago, but the grief is still immense. I can't even bring myself to get out of bed without sheer willpower forcing me to do so.

An outfit was already chosen for me. All black.

I always loathed that color, as it was associated with death.

Today… I don't care.

I didn't pay attention to anything or even anyone as I was lethargically dragging myself to outside, where the funeral was going to be.

It's plain gray outside with lots of fog.

Well, aren't they just _perfect _conditions for attending my parents' funeral.

I was the only one standing between the two great stones. Elsa didn't even show up.

The service went on and on; normally, I would be too jumpy and all over the place due to my unusually high energy level. But I… can't bring the energy in me to rise. Not even when it was my turn to speak:

"Father and Mother were the most amazing parents I've ever had. They raised Elsa and me with love and support, always putting our needs before theirs. They loved us dearly and I wish I could see them again one last time. To let them know… how much I appreciate all of their efforts to provide for us."

I looked up to the Heavens above and with burning tears starting to flow down my face, discreetly whispered: "I love you Mama and Papa."

My body shaking with agonizing sorrow, I didn't stay for the reception. I just trudged along the hallway and for the last time, knocked on Elsa's door.

"Elsa?"

"_Please, I know you're in there_

_People are asking where you've been_

_They say, "Have courage" and I'm trying to_

_I'm right out here for you_

_Just let me in_

_We only have each other_

_It's just you and me_

_What are we going to do?_

As I slid down her door, I asked her the one question that seemed to always strengthen me.

_Do you want to build a snowman?"_

I sighed sadly because I realized that for the first time, I am truly alone. Not just for our parents' deaths, but rather, not having anyone to… be with.

Someone… like…

God knows. But whoever is out there, they'll always be there for me.

Oh, Elsa… How I still love you dearly despite everything.

I am crying softly because I didn't want Elsa to hear my pain. I didn't want her to suffer like I have suffered over the last ten years.

I slowly got up and went to my bedroom.

I just want- no. I need… love…

But I can never have it.

Because I am all alone.


End file.
